I have seen more than a dozen posts on how single people offer the best relationship advice. Believing this notion to be true (considering the number of relationship advice scurrying around in my head), it got me thinking and asking a basic question, why do singles have the best relationship advice? As a single lady myself, I easily got the answer or answers and I think I should share them.
Here are 4 reasons why single people give the best relationship advice:
One, we have a better perspective. Our judgment is not clouded by hormones and feelings. Our thought process is not inhibited by sentiments. We can think clearly and give a more logical and rational answer. We exist outside the relationship and we are not a party to it, hence we can be objective. In most relationship-related issues, it isn’t that the parties don’t know what to do or they don’t see a solution, but you see this thing call love, (*deep breath) it makes even the most logical human irrational when it hits hard. Those that have been in love can testify to that.
Two, we’ve seen it all. We are single, but that doesn’t mean we’ve always been single. There is a probability that the single lady or man giving you a piece of advice has gone through what you are experiencing. They went through it, took certain steps that may or may not have worked, hence they can proffer a better solution to you. Falling in love, especially for the first time can be quite… intoxicating. Meanwhile, most single people have been in and out of love. They are in the best position to keep you anchored to the reality that though love is a wonderful feeling and you should embrace, heartbreak is also one of the most painful ordeals in life. Like two sides of a coin, all it takes to flip that blissful and giddy feeling upside down is a wrong toss from a partner. We speak from experience and as they say, experience is the best teacher.
Three, we’ve been through it all. There is a high chance that the previous relationship ended badly, with heartbreak and hurt. We have been hurt in relationships and we have recovered. To put simply and elegantly, we are survivors. Who better to give tips on how to avoid or recover from heartbreak if not a former patient?
Four, most single people are single not because we don’t have an option, but because our previous relationship has taught us to take our time. We are single, not for lack of options, but because we don’t want to settle for just anybody. We see the value or otherwise in every person we come across and can read them better to see their true intentions.
It should be noted that apart from the basic rules, there are no general guidelines in relationships or in dealing with one’s partner. People are very different from each other. What didn’t work in the relationship of another that led to breakup may be the very band that will hold your relationship together. While seeking advice in a relationship is not bad, carefully listen and pick the advice that will work for your relationship. This majorly depends on your partner, so be sure to communicate— See? I’m giving advice again. I’ll stop now, so bye.