If you are blessed enough to fall in love with someone that loves you equally or maybe even more, you have no idea what the Lord (or whoever or whatever you tie your faith to) has done for you. You met this guy at university, maybe even secondary school, you guys had your issues – because which relationship doesn’t?– but you stayed together, made it together and got married. Five years later, baby bump number three is starting to show and you are still in love. If you fall into that category, I have just one question for you: how does it feel to be God’s favourite? Because that is the only explanation to me, y’all are God’s favourites.
Just kidding though.
I have never doubted God’s love for me and I pray I never find myself in a situation where I am compelled to question His love. But one has to wonder why finding love is never easy for some of us. Is it the way we talk? Our facial expressions? Don’t we smile enough? Or maybe we do too much? Is it something we do or don’t do? Or is there an All Good Men Shopping Plaza that we don’t know about? Then when we hit a certain age, the pressure becomes more real. Even our bodies and hormones start raging as if screaming at us, “You should be married by now!” We start feeling the pressure to get into any relationship that comes because of our inherent need to connect. We get so itchy and jump at every opportunity to be in a relationship, even when we know it is not right for us or that we really are not ready for one, regardless of our age.
Truth be told, it might be one of the above-listed questions (apart from the All Good Men Shopping Plaza. I don’t think that exists. If it does and you know where it is, be kind and share the address, please) but most times, it is none of the above. As a believer, I strongly believe that God is interested in every detail of my life, down to the littlest pimple on my face. As long as it bothers me, God is interested in it. He’s my loving Father. So this gives me a great assurance that He knows I should be in a relationship. He knows I should get married and, more importantly, He wants me to settle down with a good man who will love me without bounds. And so, when it’s not coming or happening as fast as my human desire wants, I’ve learnt to simply rest. Rest on His promise that, “none shall lack a mate”and rest on His word that His plans for me are of “welfare and not for evil, to give me a future and a hope.”
This helps me to wait and stay focused on what matters. Knowing that God is interested in me getting into a relationship that will lead to a blessed marriage helps me to remain logical and weigh every potential suitor. If you are a believer, this should be easy for you; rest in God’s love and His perfect intention towards you.
And if you are not, I’ll advise you to hold on to whatever or whoever you believe in. A relationship or marriage is not an adventure you want to dabble in for the sake of it. A broken relationship will leave you more damaged and alone than when you entered and a broken marriage can derail the entire trajectory of one’s life. So you want to get it right.
I hope this encourages a fellow sister or brother in the waiting patiently to get it right struggle.